I was telephoned out of the blue recently by a charming lady with concern for my health. It transpired that she believed I might have worked in a noisy environment? I said, why yes, indeed I did. (After all, the Liverpool Cathedral Organ is one of the largest and loudest musical instruments in the world. And I’m passing tactfully over the vocal capacities of the Lay Clerks singing on either side of me, who are no shrinking violets.) Continue reading He that hath ears to hear… →

It’s not usually seen as good form for Lay Clerks to take photographs, however reverently, while in procession. But Pentecost is a bit less formal. In our Liverpool version of the Whitsun Walks, both cathedrals process from one to the other (alternate directions each year). Small crowds of confused tourists gather, and passengers on the 86 bus get an unforeseen 10 minute delay as we are marshalled over crossroads. Prayers are said publicly in favour of church unity (and, privately, against sudden rainstorms like last year). Continue reading A moveable feast →

Some of the problems are well-known: the loneliness of being a minority group and strain from constant battles against basses. All unsuspecting, however, many tenors face the additional hazard of eternal damnation.

Of course, this is a problem that confronts every unrepentant sinner, but the tenor has special difficulties. Naturally, this is not because tenors are particularly sinful. No, the problem arises through the eleventh commandment, “Thou shalt not be found out”. Special measures have been taken to detect tenors in the commission of sin. An investigator has been at work for centuries: Titivillus. Continue reading On the perils of being a tenor →